Broly

Gather ‘round, Dragon Ball devotees and gluttons for punishment! This week on Play Comics, we’re subjecting ourselves to the digital equivalent of getting hit by Frieza’s Death Beam repeatedly-Dragon Ball Z Taiketsu for the Game Boy Advance. Imagine taking the most explosive anime franchise in history and cramming it into a game with all the fiery intensity of a damp firecracker. Spoiler alert: This isn’t a battle for glory-it’s a battle for survival against one of the most bafflingly awful licensed games ever conceived.

Joining me in this masochistic quest is Andrew Young from Behold!, who’s agreed to lend his expertise (and his remaining sanity) to dissect this pixelated travesty. Together, we’ll answer the burning question: How did a game about planet-destroying superhumans end up feeling as thrilling as watching paint dry on Master Roshi’s houseboat? Hint: It involves more clipping issues than Yamcha’s career and combat mechanics flatter than Krillin’s scalp.

From animations that resemble a PowerPoint presentation gone rogue to a soundtrack that sounds like a kazoo orchestra trapped in a washing machine, Taiketsu doesn’t just drop the ball-it spikes it into the core of the Earth, unleashes a Spirit Bomb of disappointment, and then forgets to animate the explosion. Whether you’re here for the schadenfreude or just morbid curiosity, grab your Dragon Radar and a stiff drink. This episode’s gonna hurt. A lot.Continue Reading